Calling-Out: David Ludden Ph.D. & Psychologytoday

Liliyan Hassan Call-out Leave a Comment

When it comes to sexuality and science, getting an admission is very rare. Hence, whenever I find a “confession”, I will be pointing it out as to set the record straight in regards to what men are aware of in relation to how we feel.  The article at hand is entitled Putting the Sex in Sexagenarian and it is written by David Ludden who is a professor of psychology at Georgia Gwinnett College. The article speaks about age and sex as it begins with a question where David asks the readers: “Why do grandmothers have sex? This is a question that baffles both young adults and evolutionary psychologists alike.” Although I have a lot to say in relation to the article written, I want to point to an admission made in the following paragraph within the article:

“It’s true that some women lose sexual desire after menopause. But it’s also true that other women experience a sexual flourishing around this time. Finally free of the fear of pregnancy and with a mature understanding of herself, a postmenopausal woman can now enjoy sex in ways she never could as a young woman—and she wants lots of it.”

So let us put it on record that men are aware of the fact that FEAR is often attached to sex and that such FEAR is a fear that is related to pregnancies. “FINALLY FREE OF THE FEAR” says that there is a sense of relief that is related to sex that has not found a resolution except for 60 years later and men are aware of it.  To call the removal of such fear, “sexual flourishing” is indeed an insult as that  fear is not a thing that comes to a woman without a man being involved in the picture. Meaning: if men give women a sexual break while in her 20s and 30s and 40s and 50s, I bet the woman will “flourish” more during a time when she is able to do more than sex and during a time when she is at the prime of her life as to be active in this world past her own self. Yet, for a woman to “flourish” during her menopausal years and thereafter shows that a woman is being hindered by fear as to feel more alive when part of that fear is removed. Why are women not feeling this “flourishing” in their 20s and 30s and 40s and 50s? And how shall a 70 year old woman express her new sense of relief except when she has  no other place to associate it lest it is related to sex itself and her grandchildren? Flourishing within the four walls of her home is what women have been “given permission” to do until they are blue in the face. I understand that many women are active in this world during and after menopause… but I am speaking about women in general and in relation to finding a sense of “relief” when it is not the best time to “start” something new in her life and for her own self where she would rather have felt that relief much earlier. Not only that, but I am suggesting that this “fear” that comes as women are being more sexually active without intending to get pregnant is something that hinders women in such fashion where things like abortions is allowing men to make use of women instead of allowing women to make use of their own selves. Meaning: where fear is removed due to abortions being available, women are not having more of themselves but men are having more sex with women for themselves. And that is something to indeed be worried about more so than the fear itself given that the woman is not in fear because she needs a man but she in fear for her own condition. When men ignore such fear, they are attempting to control women and when that fear is removed through birth control and abortions, men are still trying to control women because no one loves getting an abortion as abortions and birth control pills create a sense of confusion in relation to how a woman feels about sex and men.

Another thing I want to point out is that men are aware that young women are not so much enjoying sex despite the fact that statistics show them having a lot of it as to raise questions in regards to the free-will of women and the influence that men have on women and their decisions. When men say  ” a postmenopausal woman can now enjoy sex in ways she never could as a young woman—and she wants lots of it.” we need to wipe our foreheads in relief because FINALLY, DUDE… I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW HAPPY I AM THAT THIS IS HAPPENING FOR YOU!!! I AM SO GLAD THAT “LOTS OF IT” IS WHAT WOMEN WANT GIVEN THAT NOT LONG AGO THEY WERE ACTING LIKE STUCK UP BITCHES! I THOUGHT THE CRACKED BRIDGE WAS GOING TO COLLAPSE BUT NOPE… SHE WAS ABLE TO CROSS IT AND LAND ON YOUR GENITALS AS “I WANT TO” IS A THING THAT SHOULD JUST AS MUCH COME AFTER AS IT SHOULD BE FOLLOWED BY, “WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY?” IN ORDER TO MAKE A “WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY?I WANT TO….WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY?” SANDWICH FOR YOU TO EAT OUT OF HER FREE WILL! AND LOOK AT YOU, SILLY, YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO STARVE TO DEATH! (FOREHEAD WIPE AGAIN BEFORE THROWING MYSELF ON THE COUCH AS I EXPRESS A SENSE OF RELIEF NEVER HEARD OF OR SEEN BEFORE). YEP WWIII WAS ON THE HORIZON BUT THE LORD HAS SENT US A WAY FOR PEACE! “LOTS OF IT” TOO. I MEAN THE LORD IS NOT STINGY AND NEITHER IS HE UNREASONABLE—-IT IS JUST A BUNCH OF BODIES AND WHO CARES WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM! (when speaking of bodies laying on the ground after a mayhem of a war has slaughtered them and flies have begun to gather all over them…”who cares and so what?!” becomes the right expression! )

David writes, “Even men in their 60s are quite capable of fathering children, yet plenty of research shows that they too experience a decrease in sexual desire.” And I would like to point out that such men experience a decrease in desire in general when it comes to anything and everything. And I would also like to point out this hypothesis (since David and other scientists want to draw on frivolous hypotheses): Maybe the reason why some women want to have more sex when they get older is because men desire it less at the same time her period stops given the animalistic evolutionary urge to reproduce is turned off via the remote control that is the woman he has partnered up with for those purposes… where then the woman feels more at will and less at fear all at once as to not know what to do with herself which would explain the desire to be attached at the hips with another person since again she does not know what to do with herself. And given that women at that age are “shut off” is relation to reproductive worth, a man sustains his lower sexual desire as to not have it increase back to where it was prior to the first signs that the remote-control-of-a-woman has hit menopause.

Remote controls, evolution, fear, survival, sex, and MANY unanswered questions in between: oh my… how easy it is to turn men on is just so unfair to us!  I mean “sneezing” would be enough to qualify as a turn-on given the theory that men are working with! Cover up your hair ladies and your faces too…Evolution turns us into a remote control and we cannot walk an inch before landing on a button as to make a man follow…. And surprise: the “off” button takes 60 years to walk to as it is in the bottom left side and we are born in the upper right side of Manhattan…by the time we get there, we would be in the ghetto outside of the city we love so much but that is okay because if Miranda can move there with her baby and make it, so can we!

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Liliyan Hassan

Liliyan Hassan

Founder: Go for Women

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