Did the man you sleep with not call you after sex?

In Sex & Dating by Liliyan Hassan1 Comment

In our culture, men often date women.  They go out a few times. He acts as if he is interested in something serious. The woman, thinking that he is interested in something serious, sleeps with him. And then he never calls her after that.

The next day, the woman may feel confused. She may even cry and feel down for a while. Usually society looks at her as the problem: she was too easy, she should have known, she is boy-crazy, she is a stalker…the list goes on.

Consent: it is harmony in the agreement. PART OF CONSENT: the assumption that the people involve have mutual feelings towards each other. The bases of this consent is honesty about feelings. Hence, if one must lie in order to get another person’s consent, then there was no consent. If you must lie to a woman in order that you sleep with her, then she gave you her consent based on that lie and not the truth. THEN WHY ASK FOR A CONSENT? You cannot tell a woman that you love her or that you are serious about her, and then sleep with her only to never speak to her again. She gave her consent thinking that you care about her. And if she would have said “yes” knowing the truth, then why did you have to lie? Meaning: you knew that the consent may not come otherwise. THIS IS RAPE-AFTER-THE-FACT. It is no different than putting a date-rape pill in her drink; where she feels something due to a whole other reason than the truth–and then the next day, waking up to feel like herself again: raped! “I would not have said YES if I was not drunk/if he did not lie/if the pill was not in my drink!” It is an abuse of goodness. The terms of agreement matter. And both must have a harmony within that agreement.

Today, men who lie to women in order that they sleep with them are applauded. We call them: players, studs, pimps, lady’s man, etc. They are high-fiving each other at the cost of these women.This is not the way people should behave with each other. We are not here to play, “who can we trick the most?” People should not feel cheated after being around you. We currently may see this behavior to be part of the “dating game”; but it is nothing short of the rape game to me!

About the Author

Liliyan Hassan

Founder: Go for Women


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