The Sexual Harassment Movement

Liliyan Hassan Racism, Sex Work, Sexism, violence Leave a Comment

We have a new movement going on ladies and if you have been signed up against your will, you will be comforted to hear that “MeToo” is the box that was checked on your behalf–about a 1000 years ago— in order to RSVP you to this glorious event. Sexual harassment is everything a woman needs to have her tailor fitted party of a lifetime. After all, men wanted the world the way they wanted it without any compromises at all as if he was taking a crap (that is the only place you can do things as you like without anyone else daring to object). And out of this crappy demand, women began to do as told or else as if they are the force behind the dump without having the right to push anyone’s buttons. After all these years, however, men have created a multi-layered sediment where society has its own “certain way” and where adulthood has its own “certain way” and where formality has its own “certain way” all for the sake of women to feel that they have a place to go kick rocks if the “certain way” of one place is getting on her nerves—-there is always another “certain way” for you girlie to go and change your mood.

Although the sexual harassment cases happening in our country today are mostly in relation to men in power, it is to be noted that sexual harassment is a thing that is due to power anyways in relation to all men and women. The lawsuits happening across the country need not to make us forget that every man is a rich and powerful man in relation to the past and to the history that women have endured. And although you may say to me that no man is too poor and no man is too under privileged to sexually harass a woman, I would like to reply to you and tell you: “Precisely!” Because no man is too poor and no man is too under privileged to sexually harass a woman. Again, all men are too rich and too powerful to sexually harass women. Yet, I shall repeat what I have said again as men like to do in relation to principles themselves and call it a 2 for 1-create-your-own-special: And although I would like to say that no man is too poor and no man is too under privileged to sexually harass a woman, I would like to tell you that men have enslaved others (1)as to create a group of men who are too poor and too under privileged to harass women (2) as to create a disassociation between power, money, and sexism. Two for one special: creating a group in order NOT to create a connection. Hence, although we would like to be in support of African American men in their struggles against racism (as if we are doing anything besides saying, “this sucks!”), I cannot in good conscience dismiss the sexual harassment suffered by black women who are under privileged since I view them to be similar to a woman who is held up in a hostage situation. Black women cannot continue to be subjected to sexual harassment as a form of a lifestyle due to racism. So even though we have a group of men who are too poor and too under privileged in relation to other men, we cannot allow for this issue to make us forget the power and privilege that all men have in relation to women as it creates a hierarchy in relation to acceptance of sexual harassment—a hierarchy which all men from all races benefit using black men and their condition. Hence, the question becomes, “In relation to women, is there such a thing as a race?” And if the answer is, “yes” then it is divisional against her… and if it is divisional against her, then what is a freaking “yes” worth?! (ask same in relation to consent and you get a close to accurate answer: it aint worth shit). And if the answer is “no” then with that “no” comes a lack of isolation. This lack of isolation is a thing without boundaries. And this lack of isolation is a thing that is needed to be removed in order to end sexual harassment where today we are struggling to create and enforce new boundaries as a solution that is not getting us anywhere fast. Meaning: sexual harassment requires boundaries against women. Today we are adding boundaries to a sexist world that has over flooded our homes already (adding boundaries for women to the boundaries established against them—aka taking ownership of shit). WE ARE ADDING BOUNDARIES TO RESOLVE SEXUAL HARASSMENT WHEN WE SHOULD BE REMOVING THEM.

The idea of sexual consent, which in a sexist world stems from the lack of worth in this “yes”, is a falsehood in relation to the truth of reality but it is a necessity in relation to organized crimes. Go ahead ladies, say “yes” in relation to organized crime and I shall ask you, “are you even allowed to say NO?” It is oh so insane. It is absolutely insane to deal with a man because no one should be dealt with. It is the same insane that men felt okay in doing to women where they needed to find a perfect way to deal with us. To ask, “how do we deal with sexual harassment?” is the same as asking, “how do we deal with these men?” and it appears to me that women are divided in relation to class, race, careers, lifestyle, religions, etc… and it just appears that it would be safe to conclude that these divisions are the same ones we had for thousands of years where now we are saying, “the way we deal with men at work is not working out so well!!” and “the way we deal with men here in the ghetto is not working out so well” and “the way we deal with men on the street is not working out so well” etc etc. Hence, it becomes a better thing to say, “Why is this our fault?” even if we are standing up to say, “this is not my fault”. It is our fault as far as we can say today and as far as reality is concerned. We still live the past world of “this is our fault”. And let me tell you something dear men: when it is still our fault, then there is no such thing as a black woman or a white woman or a Hispanic woman or an Asian woman or an Arab woman or a Jewish woman or a European woman or an Australian woman…specially in regards to the fact that there is a black man and a white man and a Hispanic man and an Asian man and an Arab man and a Jewish man and a European man and an Australian man. What is this nonsense that each woman hates when she is participating in it but must defend whenever she is around others? Let women be black and white and Hispanic and Asian and Arab and Jewish and European and Australian when you need us and let us be women of one kind amongst each other. Removal of boundaries is not negotiable.

Relationships bind people together. And I believe that there is no greater sexual harassment suffered by women than that from her own boyfriend against her since it is a very sexually controlled environment full of boundaries. The elimination of sexual harassment is a thing that has required flawed cultures, traditions, marriage rules, and a status quo conduct in order to set boundaries that define a proper sexual approach. YES, ladies: all these things were put in place in order that you are not sexually harassed…can you believe it?! Here is how to marry a woman without bothering her….here is how you approach a woman in order to get to know her…here is how and here is how not. Yet today, we are moving past the bullshit into a new zone of sexual defiance—-excuse me while I put my burqa on for a minute in order to continue this lecture and say–with all due respect to freedom of choice and with an utter lack of respect towards decency and self control towards the bullshit itself that I will not let the bullshit make me do anything but carry its terms with the pleasure of my own amazing consent. Meaning that we are not moving past the bullshit but we are still trying to flip it off in rage as we give each other a big F you as if it was an unfair test. When I say that there is no greater sexual harassment suffered by women than that from her own boyfriend, I mean to say that the process of dating is something that allows room for men to feel that it may be okay to approach women in a sexual manner all while creating a society that is centered around people trying to find the perfect partner. So where is the line between, “I need to find a partner” and “I need not to harass this woman!” Where is the line between “she may like me” and “she may find me intrusive”? All this is happening in a world where women are still for the most part stuck in the problems of the past as sex itself has moved ahead of them into the freedom zone—-dating becomes a form of keeping up with the crowd. Sexual harassment fades into the dating zone and into the status quo itself as normal.

No one is sexually harassed. To harass a person is to distract him/her from his/herself. And to be sexual in this distraction means that one is feeling distracted by their own sexuality. Hence no one is sexually harassed but women are often made to feel distracted by their own sexuality. We do not call that “sexual harassment” but we call that “being a woman”. And when a woman is being directly distracted by a man’s sexuality, then this is what we call, “sexual harassment”. Yet, let us not forget that when a woman is being distracted by her own sexuality (sexual problems she is facing with herself such as eating disorders and self image issues, for example), that this distraction is of the same nature as sexual harassment itself and, in fact, women who have been distracted by their own sexuality are more likely to get “sexually harassed” by men (as they look more sexual than other women). In that we can say that all women have been sexually distracted without reproach and some lucky ones get sexually harassed with the chance to express their disapproval—although, I need to mention, that to be sexually distracted is to be more likely to accept being sexually harassed. Let me repeat again what I am saying: harassment is a distraction from one’s self (similar to war)… society made women a distraction to her own self using her sex against her….we do not call that “sexual harassment” but we call it, “being a woman”… when a man distracts a woman on a personal level using his sex, we call this “sexual harassment” despite that being an extension of what society calls, “being a woman”…hence, according to society: to “sexually harass” women is part of what a woman should expect in being a woman. No one is sexually harassed: because it takes a lack of ability to be one’s self for sexual harassment to happen where one feels like “no one”(insignificant)… Hence, no one is sexually harassed because, in truth, no one is insignificant. We are far removed from that truth today, however.

Sexual harassment is provisional since society’s standards towards women are conditional. This “under certain conditions” is in line with the conditions that women are subjected to today. Meaning that what we say constitutes “sexual harassment” is that which a woman is already subjected to in society at large as she is experiencing it in an overwhelming manner. She is not free from the terms of “sexual harassment” but she is still subjected to them. Hence, sexual harassment says that since a woman is treated as a sex object already, do not approach her in that manner and do not take it any further…we have reached a breaking point. And this is another reason why sexual harassment draws a blurry line. In that, it is often expected from women that men do not subject them to that which they are subjecting them to via society itself. That in itself is not something to respect, however, since the respect of such thing is not respectful towards the principle it is in regards. And this makes me want to note something towards men: The principles sexual harassment is in regards are not respectful of the principles that regard you. Meaning: to respect a woman is to respect the principles that regard her….and if you make her regard crappy principles, then to respect her is to disrespect yourself… this, in turn, makes men feel that it is okay to disrespect women if they themselves feel that the principles women were made to respect are not respectable. The question becomes, how does a woman deal with sexual harassment at the work place? And to that I say that this is besides the point since women are to be blamed where “blame” itself is the principle at hand that no one should respect since it is in regards to respect itself. Meaning that “blame” is a principle in sexual harassment where if one was to sexually harass women, “respect” is only a secondary principle that one is ready to violate for the sake of creating blame. AGAIN: if we have a principle, we need to respect it, right? Respect oversees all principles, right? But blame is a principle that needs not to be respected since blame is based on a person not respecting a principle they should have respected. And if women are disrespected when they are sexually harassed, then they are the ones to be blamed precisely because they have already been treated as the ones to blame, correct? Great, ladies, we shall carry the terms of blame on our freaking backs until we reach Mount Sinai. Hence, if I was to say that a woman is at fault, then feeling distracted from herself is evidence of that. For what is a fault that I have in myself but that which is distracting me from myself? Society has already set women up as the ones to be disrespected for the sake of the “blame”. And although we can say that we can protect women from blame by properly informing the world of the condition of women, we cannot protect a woman from her own condition where one day she may find herself in a place where she truly and with all her might feels like she is the problem and the only one to blame. This stashing of “blame” is something that is happening due to fear, bad conditions, sexist issues, power, control, poverty, socioeconomic issues, societal preference towards women, and lack of ability of women to unite as one group in relation to goals and destiny.

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