Loneliness

Liliyan Hassan Free Will, General Psychiatry, Resilience, Suicide Leave a Comment

Loneliness stands out as a suggestion not yet complete and a person is driven to loneliness due to this as they are pushed to it due to this dynamic. A suggestion is similar to one having too many options without knowing which one to take. Hence, loneliness feels like there is a lot but nothing at all—this is the type of loneliness that is related to one not fitting in or belonging. At the same time, belonging too much makes one feel a need to be alone as it also can make one feel like they are alone even in a room full of people. A suggestion says that one has proposed an idea for another to do something which means that “lack of interest” can drive one to become lonely as well as feeling depressed is often associated with loneliness. To not know which option to choose is something that gives a sense of “indecisiveness” which is often part of the feeling that makes up what it means for one to feel lonely. In addition, to not know which option to choose gives one a sense that they need to “rush as to go no where fast” which is self-consuming…and when one is stuck in this world in the same routine, they are more likely to feel lonely. To not know which option to choose  gives a sense of “peculiarity” to a person—a peculiarity that is not yet justified– hence, making them feel isolated. Furthermore, not knowing which option to choose out of all the “hallucinatory” options that exist in this world (as if the world or the loneliness itself belong to the person)  does increase the chances of one developing hallucinations and other mental illnesses while being lonely as the bases of the feeling are not logical or sensible. Not only that, but not knowing which option to choose is a feeling that is related to one being out of touch with reality as one is subconsciously “perplexed by the inability to digest the issue in full”. Moreover, to not know which option to choose gives a sense of too much effort in relation to action when it comes to doing anything  as it is taking that much effort to just ponder upon the options themselves—hence making one feel a sense of “helplessness” as that is related to being lonely. This is all what encompasses the feeling called, “loneliness” as it is a wrong-direction type of feeling where all that one actually wants is one choice: to get out of this feeling itself as it requires enthusiasm and it requires an excitement and it requires a sense of chance and purpose and it requires much more than society has to currently offer.

Check this out: If society makes a person feel this way…the mind tells itself, “I suggest that you should go and be alone for a while” thereby making “suggestion” a thing that pushes one to be lonely as it is a feeling that is created by too many impositions that should have been nothing more than a suggestion. And although this “suggestion” is made by the self, it is one that is calculated accurately to be the right thing for a person to do. Meaning: one cannot say, “you chose to be lonely” because the “choice” aspect of it is the better way the mind has accepted that which is really everyone else’s “imposition”.

There is a difference between those who are busy and do not have time to hang out with others and lonely people: those who are too busy are preoccupied in such fashion that may make them lose sight of other things important. Yet, loneliness is suggestion based and part of that suggestion is a contemplation that makes one feel preoccupied as well… except, when it comes to loneliness, to lose sight of what is important becomes one losing sight of other people as they become that which is important if one is lonely (if I am alone, others gain a sense of importance)making one feel diminished in value due to the importance of others being greater than the importance of the self to the self…hence, why a feeling of worthlessness may accompany people who are lonely. Depression is different than loneliness and I will speak about that later.

If I was to show what it is like for one to be lonely, then imagine if I was to wave at you with my hand as to ask you to come over: come over here (am waving: come over)… come over here…. in essence, I am taking the outside, raising it above me,,, and bringing it towards me as it collapses at me—and that is loneliness is relation to self vs others. How that is related to the universal way we tend to wave someone to come over could be related to this given that people seem to agree on the way we “wave someone to come over” across the world.

Loneliness is not something that is a joke because the truth be told, we are not a suggestion in relation to life…we truly exist in it. We are not a mere possibility in it, we are in it… we are not a thing that can be removed, we are here… we are not in the process of being judged upon as for us to find out if we will make it or not, we have made it here already. Hence, to attempt to cure loneliness in any way other than the actual improvement of life itself and through the granting of human rights that are fair and just to all people is a crime against the mind of a person who has suggested to its own self that it wants nothing to do with any type of none sense that takes away from it in relation to where it stands in this world and amongst others. In taking that stance and in having loneliness turn against the person may give a person a sense of defeat—which, again, is a crime against them.

Let me also mention that eagerness is a form of loneliness under which one who has a great suggestion cannot wait to see someone in order to tell them all about it. And if one was to think of loneliness in this fashion, then one can see how a person feels like everything is rushed except they are made to wait…and how one feels like they can be doing so much except they have found the thing that removes all of these options away (in a good manner here)…and one can see how others gain importance even if only in relation to what the self has to offer… and one can see how a person starts to lack interest in everything else as they cannot wait to see someone in order to tell them all bout that which they have come up with… When the flame on eagerness is put out, however, one would wish that they were eager to suggest being alone instead.

When it comes to women’s rights, I say that loneliness is mostly a default that women have to live by in our world today due to the fact that truly a woman has become nothing more than a bunch of suggestions to her own self as she is busy catering to men and their orders. Hence, it is often common to see that women are ones who feel lonely while being in a room full of people. And as men are ones who have a bunch of suggestions to give to women given that they are the experts on life as they have gotten a head start in relation to it, a sense of “lack of content” with one’s self is often a resulting feeling. To suggest sexism as a form of life is indeed a thing that can also make many women seek a “lonely life” if only for the insult that this has on the idea of “suggestion” itself as one’s mind says, “you call that a what? a suggestion?! please! this is more like ‘leave me the hell alone’…” thereby making the woman feel a sense of control over her life by being alone and by being lonely…more so than if she was to accept such suggestion as legitimate. Loneliness stands out and it is an emphasis. I will speak about emphasis next in relation to traditions and cultures given that cultures isolate people and create a sense of “community” out of that which is otherwise “loneliness” as many people feel “lonely” due to cultural beliefs and ideologies.

As I speak about suggestions, I am lead to the area of “choice”. But what I am speaking about when it comes to loneliness is a 360 degree type of choice. Think of being lost in the middle of the desert and then wanting to choose which direction to go: that is lonely and that is a lot of suggestions that do not matter one bit as one has no clue which direction to choose—despite the fact that being lost makes such choice matter too much in relation to finding the right way. Bringing that inside one’s mind and you would have the feelings I spoke of above. When one’s mind feel “deserted” it suggests to its own self (as a form of a conclusion) that it is alone as it drives that to be a feeling that is wanted due to it already kind of existing, “I feel alone..I suggest that I go and be alone for a while”.

Last but certainly not least, it is not a thing that is made for others that which is ourselves as for others to preoccupy us in our lonesome into an impositional-hiatus where we get to enjoy our time alone having a margarita with worries and fears and the threat of what will become of tomorrow. For then, it is not alone that we feel but it is alone that we fear as we run to those who abuse us as their words ring more true in relation to how much we need them as they owe us much while still giving us the impression that we have not done enough in their regards. When feeling lonely is an occupational hazard that resembles one dozing off for a second as the world moves around them in a fashion that no longer interest them, one can say that loneliness speaks about a perpetuated hypnosis that is called, “over whelmed by nothing” as nothing much becomes important while one is alone (over whelmed and nothing are now linked)… where one then becomes over whelmed by importance itself  (over whelmed and importance become linked) as to allow one no place to feel freed from criticism against their own selves as that turns criticism into an over whelming feeling (over whelmed and self-critical are now linked) that is liked due to this “over whelmed” finally finding a proper aspect to land on —if not due to it being a correct place but due to it being a good-shitty fit (self-criticism should be over whelming)…where that in itself creates a contradiction as one feels that “I do not want this criticism” and “I am pulled towards it” and “I need to free myself from this” and “I am not able to get used to it”  as one feels like they are drowning.

About the Author
Liliyan Hassan

Liliyan Hassan

Founder: Go for Women

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